It's easy to concentrate on struggle, on what is not happening, and so often, I lose track of what is happening. I don't want to do that. I want to focus both on struggle and on blessing. I want to remember the things God does, the way He blesses us in little ways that can be so easy to miss.
In the past week, God has done many little things, things that will help us so much in the short and long run. He provided my husband with three job interviews. As much as we are ready for a permanent situation to come out of an interview, I am thankful for the interviews because they remind me us not to give up hope (even though we often want to). There is a possibility for a fourth interview this week as well.
We also received a check this afternoon from the US Treasury. 2009 resulted in us owing a hefty amount to the government, an amount we somehow overpayed, and this afternoon, we received a check of the overpayment. It couldn't have come at a batter time. I also was able to babysit on Saturday night, which was both enjoyable and again offered a small cushion.
We have been praying for a monetary cushion, and while we may not receive as large a cushion as we desire, I am so grateful for every little bit. It helps. All of it. And I know God will provide us with the exact amount we need.
We are also blessed with two amazing families. My parents are kind, loving, and sincere. They support my decisions and believe in me endlessly. My husband's parents are the same. It is hard to fathom that God decided to bless us both with such wonderful families. So many dread spending time with their in-laws, and I never do. I am so thankful to have them in my life, and I could not have asked for better relatives across the board.
There is still much that needs to happen. There is still much to wonder about, to question, to worry about, but there is not much to agonize over. God is in control; He is answering our prayers to see His glory with these little gifts. He is providing just enough, which has been our prayer. We don't need excess; we need enough. I am so thankful that we have enough right now.
Through this season, we are learning so much about ourselves, about each other, about God, and about the church (and Church). As my husband stated yesterday afternoon, we would not be in this season of learning and of being receptive to God if it were not for the struggles.
I am thankful for our blessings. I am thankful (or trying to be) for our struggles as well. I know God is working through all of this. He is making all of this for His good as well as for our good and our joy. And I am excited (also a little nervous) to see what else He will do as well as to see where our lives will lead following this season.
(title from "brooklyn blurs" by the paper raincoat)